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Author I found this funny
chris-sri
Member

Registered: 3rd Apr 05
User status: Offline
23rd Jan 06 at 23:12   View User's Profile U2U Member Reply With Quote

I never quite figured out why the sexual urge of men and women differ so much.

And I never have figured out the whole Venus and Mars thing.
I have never figured out why men think with their head and women with their heart.

FOR EXAMPLE
One evening last week, my wife and I were getting into bed.
Well, the passion starts to heat up, and she eventually says:
"I don't feel like it, I just want you to hold me."

I said "WHAT????!!! What was that?!"
So she says the words that every boyfriend on the planet dreads to hear..:
"You're just not in touch with my emotional needs as a woman enough for me to satisfy your physical needs as a man."
She responded to my puzzled look by saying, "Can't you just love me for who I am and not what I do for you in the bedroom?"

Realizing that nothing was going to happen that night, I went to sleep.

The very next day I opted to take the day off of work to spend time with her. We went out to a nice lunch and then went shopping at a big, big department store.
I walked around with her while she tried on several different very expensive outfits.
She couldn't decide which one to take so I told her we'll just buy them all.

She wanted new shoes to compliment her new clothes, so I said lets get a pair for each outfit.
We went onto the jewellery department where she picked out a pair of diamond earrings.
Let me tell you...she was so excited. She must have thought I was one wave short of a shipwreck.

I started to think she was testing me because she asked for a tennis bracelet when she doesn't even know how to play tennis.
I think I threw her for a loop when I said, "That's fine, honey."
She was almost nearing sexual satisfaction from all of the excitement.

Smiling with excited anticipation she finally said, "I think this is all dear, let's go to the cashier."
I could hardly contain myself when I blurted out, "No honey, I don't feel like it."
Her face just went completely blank as her jaw dropped with a baffled "WHAT???!!!"

I then said, "Really honey! I just want you to HOLD this stuff for a while.
You're just not in touch with my financial needs as a man enough for me to satisfy your shopping needs as a woman."

And just when she had this look like she was going to kill me, I added,
"Why can't you just love me for who I am and not for the things I buy you?"

Apparently I'm not having sex tonight either...



gsi-gaz
Member

Registered: 23rd Mar 03
Location: st helens
User status: Offline
23rd Jan 06 at 23:14   View User's Profile U2U Member Reply With Quote

pmsl
ssj_kakarot
Member

Registered: 29th Apr 03
Location: hartlepool
User status: Offline
24th Jan 06 at 00:22   View User's Profile U2U Member Reply With Quote

thats quality lol
Dan B
Member

Registered: 25th Feb 01
User status: Offline
24th Jan 06 at 00:41   View User's Profile U2U Member Reply With Quote

Old, but funny every time I read it!
sac1508
Member

Registered: 28th Nov 05
User status: Offline
24th Jan 06 at 01:40   View User's Profile U2U Member Reply With Quote

very funny!!!!
Butler
Member

Registered: 2nd Jun 05
Location: London
User status: Offline
24th Jan 06 at 01:49   View User's Profile U2U Member Reply With Quote

good that

 
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