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Author So you feel stupid?
AndyCorsa
Member

Registered: 24th Oct 03
Location: Macclesfield, Cheshire
User status: Offline
27th Sep 05 at 12:18   View User's Profile U2U Member Reply With Quote

These are actual comments these people made, apparently. Read on...


Question: If you could live forever, would you and why?

Answer: "I would not live forever, because we should not live forever,
because if we were supposed to live forever, then we would live forever,
but we cannot live forever, which is why I would not live forever,"

Miss Alabama in the 1994 Miss USA contest.

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"Whenever I watch TV and see those poor starving kids all over the world,
I can't help but cry. I mean I'd love to be skinny like that, but not with
all those flies and death and stuff."

Mariah Carey

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"Smoking kills. If you're killed, you've lost a very important part of your life,"

Brooke Shields, during an interview to become Spokesperson for federal anti-smoking campaign.

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"I've never had major knee surgery on any other part of my body,"

Winston Bennett, University of Kentucky basketball forward.
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"Outside of the killings, Washington has one of the lowest crime rates in
the country,"

Mayor Marion Barry, Washington, DC.

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"I'm not going to have some reporters pawing through our papers. We are the president." (we are????)

Hillary Clinton commenting on the release of subpoenaed documents.

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"That lowdown scoundrel deserves to be kicked to death by a jackass, and I'm just the one to do it,"

A congressional candidate in Texas.

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"Half this game is ninety percent mental."

Philadelphia Phillies manager, Danny Ozark

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"It isn't pollution that's harming the environment. It's the impurities in
our air and water that are doing it."

Al Gore, Vice President (DUH !) and he wanted to be President!!!!!!!!!

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"I love California. I practically grew up in Phoenix." does he know where
he almost grew up???.....

Dan Quayle

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"We've got to pause and ask ourselves: How much clean air do we need?" (I say all we can get, I'll take his clean air)

Lee Iacocca

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"The word "genius" isn't applicable in football. A genius is a guy like Norman Einstein."

Joe Theisman, NFL football quarterback & sports analyst.

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"We don't necessarily discriminate. We simply exclude certain types of people." (Oh, well that's different, I think)??????

Colonel Gerald Wellman, ROTC Instrutor.

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"If we don't succeed, we run the risk of failure." (really???????)

Bill Clinton, President

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"We are ready for an unforeseen event that may or may not occur."

Al Gore, VP (damn he's smart)

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"Traditionally, most of Australia's imports come from overseas."

Keppel Enderbery

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"Your food stamps will be stopped effective March 1992 because we received notice that you passed away. May God bless you. You may reapply if there is a change in your circumstances."

Department of Social Services, Greenville, South Carolina

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"If somebody has a bad heart, they can plug this jack in at night as they
go to bed and it will monitor their heart throughout the night. And the
next morning, when they wake up dead, there'll be a record."

Mark S. Fowler, FCC Chairman

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Made me laugh anyway

[Edited on 27-09-2005 by AndyCorsa]
Edd
Member

Registered: 8th Nov 04
Location: Glasgow
User status: Offline
27th Sep 05 at 12:21   View User's Profile U2U Member Reply With Quote

"Half this game is ninety percent mental."

Philadelphia Phillies manager, Danny Ozark

this one got me

 
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