kz
Member
Registered: 9th Aug 02
Location: Southend, Essex Drives: Mini Cooper S
User status: Offline
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A cruise in the Pacific goes all wrong, the ship sinks, and
there were only 3 survivors; Damian, Darren and Deirdre..........
They managed to swim to a small island.......and they lived
there for a couple of years..... doing what's natural for men and women
to do.....
After several years of casual sex, all the time, Deirdre felt
absolutely horrible about what she had been doing...................
She felt having sex with both Damian and Darren was so bad
that she killed herself...............
It was very tragic but Damian and Darren managed to get
through it and, after a while nature once more took its inevitable
course..............
Well, a couple more years went by and Damian and Darren began
to feel absolutely horrible about what they where
doing.....................
So...............
............They buried her.
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and heres another one whilst we at it
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An office manager was given the task of hiring an individual to fill a job opening. After sorting through a stack of resumes he found four people who were equally qualified. He decided to call the four in and ask them only one question. Their answer would determine which of them would get the job. The day came and as the four sat around the conference room table the interviewer asked: "What is the fastest thing you know of?"
Acknowledging the first man on his right, the man replied, "A THOUGHT. It just pops into your head. There's no warning that it's on the way; it's just there. A thought is the fastest thing I know of."
"That's very good!" replied the interviewer. "And now you sir?" he asked the second man. "Hmm....let me see. A blink! It comes and goes and you don't know that it ever happened. A BLINK is the fastest thing I know of." "Excellent!" said the interviewer. "The blink of an eye ... that's a very popular clich?for speed."
He then turned to the third man who was contemplating his reply. "Well, out at my dad's ranch, you step out of the house and on the wall there's a light switch. When you flip that switch, way out across the pasture the light in the barn comes on in less than an instant. TURNING ON A LIGHT is the fastest thing I can think of." The interviewer was very impressed with the third answer and thought he had found his man. "It's hard to beat the speed of light" he said.
Turning to the fourth and final man, the interviewer posed the same question. It's obvious to me that the fastest thing known is DIARRHEA." "WHAT!?" said the interviewer, stunned by the response. "Oh I can explain." said the fourth man. "You see the other day I wasn't feeling so good and I ran for the bathroom. But, before I could THINK, BLINK, or TURN ON THE LIGHT, I had already sh*t my pants!"
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