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Fonz

Premium Member

Registered: 12th May 06
Location: Newbury, Berks
User status: Online

11th Apr 08 at 06:49

Padddy & Mick are walking home after a night out and pass the bus depot. "Lets just steal a bus home" says Paddy, not wanting to walk. He offers to keep watch as Mick looks for a bus.

20minutes pass and Paddy hasnt heard anything so goes in search for Mick fearing the worse. He find Micks flapping "I cant find a no7"
"you fucking idiot" Paddy replied, "just take a no9 and we'll walk from the roundabout!"

Matt L

Member

Registered: 17th Apr 06
User status: Offline

11th Apr 08 at 08:25

iv got one ill post in a min

Jambo

Member

Registered: 8th Sep 01
Location: Maidenhead, Drives: VXR Arctic
User status: Offline

11th Apr 08 at 09:17

Matt L

Member

Registered: 17th Apr 06
User status: Offline

11th Apr 08 at 09:45

heres mine
an irish man is sitting in a canoe and rowing in the middle of a corn field.. another irish man whose driving past stops and shouts over to him... 'its people like you who give the irish a bad name and if i could swim id come over and kick your ass'

Kathryn W

Member

Registered: 12th Oct 03
Location: Widnes, Cheshire
User status: Offline

11th Apr 08 at 09:47

here's mine...

Three snails, Mike, Les and Ted, decide to go on a picnic. They pack a picnic basket with beer and sandwiches. The trouble is the picnic site is a mile away so it takes them ten days to get there. When they do, Mike unpacks the food and beer. 'Ok Ted give me the bottle opener', 'I didn't bring it' says Ted. 'I thought you packed it'. Mike gets worried, he turns to Les,'
Did you bring the bottle opener'. Naturally Les didn't bring it. So they're stuck a mile from anywhere without a bottle opener. They both beg Ted to go back for it. But he refuses as he says they will eat all the sandwiches when he's gone. After two hours, and after they have sworn on their snail lives that they will not eat the sandwiches, he finally agrees. So Ted sets off down the road at a steady pace. 20 days pass and he still isn't back and Mike and Les are starving, but a promise is a promise. Another 5 days and he still isn't back, but a promise is a promise. Finally they can't take it any longer so they take out a sandwich each, and just as they are about to eat it, Ted pops up from behind a rock and shouts 'I knew it'......'I'm not going now.'

Tom

Member

Registered: 3rd Apr 02
Location: Wirral, Merseyside
User status: Offline

11th Apr 08 at 09:49

You would kill ted, wouldn't you