Shelly
Premium Member
Registered: 15th Nov 00
Location: Lancashire Drives: Astra H VXR
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My friend had a car accident last week, where he ended up on his roof. His car is a write off and he managed to escape with only cuts and bruises.
But talking to him now, he says he has trouble driving and being in the car, has trouble concentrating and is feeling very alone like he has lost his self worth. He is physically upset about it and I don't think he is sleeping. A few of the symptoms of Post Traumatic Stress.
I was wondering if anyone had ever experienced the same kind of thing and/or have you any ideas what I could do to help?
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Neo
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Registered: 20th Feb 07
Location: Essex
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With my brother, exact same thing happened, car ended on its roof in a ditch.
He didnt take it well at all, but i went to his and spent a week or 2 at his house, we just went out and had a laugh, made his sleep at the right times and stuff.
Just needs friends round him.
Another friend of mine had a crash and i just tried to support him whenever i could, give him lifts, and drive really carefully when he was in the car.
Best thing is just be courtious to the feelings and be a good mate.
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Richie
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Registered: 3rd Dec 02
Location: Newport, Wales
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I have the same after pretty much any car accident.
Tell him to get out with some mates in his car, that really helps. He will still be cautious driving but it will take his mind off it.
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lil_g
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Registered: 29th Oct 06
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When I had my accident last summer, I didn't find it hard to be in cars generally, but I felt really worried and nervous coming up to junctions etc.
For a while I was quite down as I thought I'd lost a part of me in a way, I couldnt get around a lot, so had no freedom.
I'm still a lot more wary at junctions now than I ever was, but I think it was just because it was such a big shock to be told that you could have died if you pulled out faster 
anyway shelly, as neo said, support him as much as you can, go round and see him often, take him out places (arcades, cinema, parks etc.) Places he'd like to go if he could 
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Shelly
Premium Member
Registered: 15th Nov 00
Location: Lancashire Drives: Astra H VXR
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I can't really take him out. He's a work friend but we chat outside of work too. He has a girlfriend, so suggesting I go out places with him might cause trouble.
I just wondered what to suggest to him to bring his confidence in life back up. He was really bubbly and a good laugh before, I don't like seeing him like this.
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Neo
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Registered: 20th Feb 07
Location: Essex
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Double Dates ?
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Shelly
Premium Member
Registered: 15th Nov 00
Location: Lancashire Drives: Astra H VXR
User status: Offline
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I don't have a boyfriend.
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pow
Premium Member
Registered: 11th Sep 06
Location: Hazlemere, Buckinghamshire
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I'm a nervous reack as a passenger (Neo will tell you this) and I suffered quite badly after my accident. But, you need to be told and realise that onwards and upwards really, that accidnets happen and you can't live in the past
TBF his girlfriend should be doing more...?
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C2RL R
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Registered: 28th Mar 02
Location: Redcliffe, QLD
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quote:
Originally posted by Shelly
I don't have a boyfriend.
want one?
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Shelly
Premium Member
Registered: 15th Nov 00
Location: Lancashire Drives: Astra H VXR
User status: Offline
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quote:
Originally posted by pow
I'm a nervous reack as a passenger (Neo will tell you this) and I suffered quite badly after my accident. But, you need to be told and realise that onwards and upwards really, that accidnets happen and you can't live in the past
TBF his girlfriend should be doing more...?
I keep telling him he came out of it hardly hurt and he should get on with life and enjoy himself. I've told him he should relax too, he's always here there and everywhere. I just want my bubbly over confident friend back... Not nice to see your friends like this and you're not sure what you should say.
His girlfriend is an idiot, she doesn't appreciate him and just has a go at him all the time. He needs support not being got at.
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Shelly
Premium Member
Registered: 15th Nov 00
Location: Lancashire Drives: Astra H VXR
User status: Offline
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quote:
Originally posted by C2RL R
quote:
Originally posted by Shelly
I don't have a boyfriend.
want one?
Not yet! 
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C2RL R
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Registered: 28th Mar 02
Location: Redcliffe, QLD
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Ryk
Member
Registered: 27th Mar 06
Location: Whalley, Lancs!
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I'll take him out round the piggeries! That'll cure his fear 
I always find facing your fears is the best way round them!!
Fear is in the eye of the beholder!
Confidence isn't the absense of fear, but the knowledge of fear with the will to go on!
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Shelly
Premium Member
Registered: 15th Nov 00
Location: Lancashire Drives: Astra H VXR
User status: Offline
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quote:
Originally posted by Ryk
I'll take him out round the piggeries! That'll cure his fear
That will make him worse 
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Hamish
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Registered: 4th Apr 05
Location: Ashtead, Surrey Drives: 100bhp Mint with Hole
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I found i was really nervous after i had my car crash. Went every where at 20mph
Just needs to get back into the routine of driving slowly
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C2RL R
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Registered: 28th Mar 02
Location: Redcliffe, QLD
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his bird sounds like a selfish bitch btw
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Scotty C
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Registered: 6th Nov 05
Location: Kidderminster Drives: 1.6 16v Sport
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I had PTA, thats no help tho
Just take him out for a nice quiet drink and get him to talk through the accident as that'll help him alot, comfort him, and tell him there will always be someone their for him.
[Edited on 20-03-2008 by Monster]
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chloe16v
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Registered: 29th Nov 07
Location: Rotherham
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i had my first crash 2 months after i passed my test, now i wont go any where near a motorway (even tho it didnt happen on the motorway) n i dont like bein in cars when some1 else is drivin as i dont feel in control
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Ben G
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Registered: 12th Jan 07
Location: Essex
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never had any of that with my accidents.
they were all whilst it was raining though so i'm usually seen going rather slow and being a bit too cautious when it rains.
love driving though so i could neve let an accident take that away from me.
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ClaireF
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Registered: 1st Nov 05
Location: hurlford, scotland Drives: corsa again
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i felt stressed when i was in a car that hit someone. i would close my eyes and would see the persons head hit the windscreen again and again
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Scotty C
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Registered: 6th Nov 05
Location: Kidderminster Drives: 1.6 16v Sport
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quote:
Originally posted by Ben G
never had any of that with my accidents.
they were all whilst it was raining though so i'm usually seen going rather slow and being a bit too cautious when it rains.
love driving though so i could neve let an accident take that away from me.
Har har. wait till you have a serious one
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Ryk
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Registered: 27th Mar 06
Location: Whalley, Lancs!
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I believe in fate and that if it's going to happen it will and you have no say in it. I've been in four crashes whilst I've been driving, none of which my fault and have all been whilst i've been driving slowly/cautiously. I don't for a second condone driving fast or over the speed limit but if I had been 3 of them wouldn't of happened thats for sure.
I believe that everything happens for a reason, it might of happened to him so he realises how much of a tool his Mrs is or just a challange he has to rise too.
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Richie B
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Registered: 18th Apr 04
Location: Newcastle
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quote:
Originally posted by C2RL R
quote:
Originally posted by Shelly
I don't have a boyfriend.
want one?
FLOL
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