Mark330d
Member
Registered: 25th Apr 06
Location: Netherlee, Glasgow City
User status: Offline
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She had a fanny like a stab wound in a gorilla's back
Look's like she's been dooking for apples in a chip pan
Had mair hauns up her than sooty!
Shes got a face like a dug lickin pish aff a thistle.
She's got a face that could make an onion cry.
I wouldn't ride her into battle.
Mair chins than a chinese phone book
She smells like an alkies carpet
It's like shaggin a pail of water.
She's killed more cocks than a fowl butcher
Fanny like a ripped out fireplace
Face like a sand blasted tomato
She sweats like a dog in a Chinese restaurant
She's seen more helmets than Hitler
Face like a stuntman's knee
She's seen more cockends than weekends
Its like throwing a sausage up a close
A left her wi a face like a painter's radio
Fanny like a clowns pocket
She's that ugly no' even a sniper would take her out
I bet she's got a fanny like a pub carpet
More pricks than a second hand dartboard.
Face like a blind joiners thumb
Even the tide wouldnt take her out
Got more finger prints on her than scotland yard
Got a fanny like a gutted trout
Got a fanny like a burst couch
Shes had more seamen than saltcoats
Does yer da have a beard or was that yer maw doing handstands at the windae
again?
Shes seen mare stiffs than Quincy!
Shes seen mare cokes than a bottle of bacardi!
Shes got a face like a treble 20!
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Carl
Member
Registered: 9th May 04
Location: Jimmy Bennett's la la land.
User status: Offline
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hey Mary doll. 
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andy1868
Member
Registered: 22nd Jun 06
Location: Burscough, Lancashire
User status: Offline
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Andy Stocker
Member
Registered: 31st Aug 00
Location: Herts Drives: Porsche 911
User status: Offline
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Needs translating from Scottish to English 
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Dave A
USER UNDER INVESTIGATION - DO NOT TRADE
Registered: 10th Dec 03
Location: County Durham
User status: Offline
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Mark, you must meet some great girls
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Mark330d
Member
Registered: 25th Apr 06
Location: Netherlee, Glasgow City
User status: Offline
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dave, least i can get half decent looking girls
xxxxxxxx
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Dave A
USER UNDER INVESTIGATION - DO NOT TRADE
Registered: 10th Dec 03
Location: County Durham
User status: Offline
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I prefer boys TBH
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Mark330d
Member
Registered: 25th Apr 06
Location: Netherlee, Glasgow City
User status: Offline
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thought so, do you agree with the term , "once up the bum no harm done?"
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Colin
Member
Registered: 4th Apr 02
User status: Offline
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Its like throwing a sausage up a close 
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Carl
Member
Registered: 9th May 04
Location: Jimmy Bennett's la la land.
User status: Offline
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do you say these to your mumy at night when she tucks you in Mark?
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mark_gsi
Member
Registered: 1st Nov 03
Location: Peterlee/darlington
User status: Offline
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more cockends than weekends 
[Edited on 22-05-2007 by mark_gsi]
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Mark330d
Member
Registered: 25th Apr 06
Location: Netherlee, Glasgow City
User status: Offline
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quote:
Originally posted by Carl
do you say these to your mumy at night when she tucks you in Mark?
nah, its your mum i say them to.
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Carl
Member
Registered: 9th May 04
Location: Jimmy Bennett's la la land.
User status: Offline
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quote:
Originally posted by Mark330d
quote:
Originally posted by Carl
do you say these to your mumy at night when she tucks you in Mark?
nah, its your mum i say them to.
she will stop you from playing out on your push bike if you are nasty.
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Mark330d
Member
Registered: 25th Apr 06
Location: Netherlee, Glasgow City
User status: Offline
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quote:
Originally posted by Carl
quote:
Originally posted by Mark330d
quote:
Originally posted by Carl
do you say these to your mumy at night when she tucks you in Mark?
nah, its your mum i say them to.
she will stop you from playing out on your push bike if you are nasty.
she said if im bad again im on the sofa tonight
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All Torque
Member
Registered: 17th Nov 05
Location: Milton Keynes Drives: Ford Focus TDCi
User status: Offline
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She could make a train swerve.
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willay
Moderator
Organiser: South East, National Events
Premium Member
Registered: 10th Nov 02
Location: Roydon, Essex
User status: Offline
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Fanny like a ripped out fireplace
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topshot_2k
Banned
Registered: 1st Dec 03
Location: Northampton Drives: Pug GTi-6
User status: Offline
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took me 10mins just to read it
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Tom
Member
Registered: 3rd Apr 02
Location: Wirral, Merseyside
User status: Offline
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Fanny like a sandblasted tomato
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muz004
Member
Registered: 22nd May 07
Location: Aberdeen
User status: Offline
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quote:
Originally posted by Mark330d
A left her wi a face like a painter's radio
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Tarrantino
Member
Registered: 29th Sep 04
Location: Essex
User status: Offline
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quote:
Originally posted by Andy Stocker
Needs translating from Scottish to English
i thought this aswell as most of it dont make sence
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dazavich
Member
Registered: 27th Sep 06
Location: Greenock, Inverclyde
User status: Offline
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haha, awesome
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Ben G
Member
Registered: 12th Jan 07
Location: Essex
User status: Offline
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scottish 
virgin 
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Tommy L
Member
Registered: 21st Aug 06
Location: Northampton Drives: Audi wagon
User status: Offline
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quote:
Originally posted by andy1868
omg
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Scotty_B
Member
Registered: 11th Jun 03
Location: East Kilbride
User status: Offline
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She pulled her pants down and it smelled like a pissed in lift.
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