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Corsa Sport » Message Board » Off Day » How often does your gf fart?

Poll: How often does your gf fart?
0 - There is summat wrong with her! Or she is one of those sly ones 38 (35.19%)
1-4 - Silent but fecking lethal! 15 (13.89%)
1-4 - Noisey but with no smell? 14 (12.96%)
5+ - Silent but fecking lethal! 6 (5.56%)
5+ - Noisey but with no smell? 2 (1.85%)
Depends if she has had a curry 2 (1.85%)
I dont have a gf but my dog farts 9 (8.33%)
I dont have a gf or a dog, but I fart 22 (20.37%)


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Author How often does your gf fart?
All Torque
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Registered: 17th Nov 05
Location: Milton Keynes Drives: Ford Focus TDCi
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31st Jan 07 at 22:56   View User's Profile U2U Member Reply With Quote
quote:
Originally posted by SVM 286
quote:
Originally posted by All Torque
I don't know when she silently does it but i tickled her once which made her let rip and it sounded like a ship horn




*collapses on floor weeping and writhing*



<ambulance phoned for, and oxygen en route >


mav
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Registered: 19th Jun 01
Location: Scotland
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31st Jan 07 at 22:57   View User's Profile U2U Member Reply With Quote
very seldom that i 'hear' of...
All Torque
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Registered: 17th Nov 05
Location: Milton Keynes Drives: Ford Focus TDCi
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31st Jan 07 at 22:57   View User's Profile U2U Member Reply With Quote
quote:
Originally posted by Mark330d
quote:
Originally posted by CorsAsh
quote:
Originally posted by All Torque
I don't know when she silently does it but i tickled her once which made her let rip and it sounded like a ship horn


You wanna be careful if she does that in Devon, you'll have the locals running to the beaches in case there's anything to scavenge...



Quality.


Love it!
CorsAsh
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Registered: 19th Apr 02
Location: Munich
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1st Feb 07 at 00:41   View User's Profile U2U Member Reply With Quote
quote:
Originally posted by SVM 286
Good evening Ashtray darling.

May I place my order for a nice new R11?

(btw, that is the name/number of a type of small, mostly fibreglass bus that circulates in my locality)

I'd like mine in black with black wheels please.


Ok, I'll do that for you now.
VegasPhil
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Registered: 16th Jan 05
Location: Fareham, Hants Drives: Octavia VRS
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1st Feb 07 at 01:07   View Garage View User's Profile U2U Member Reply With Quote
PMFSL at this thread

Corsa 2.0 16v Vegas - Sold
Jas
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Registered: 13th Oct 04
Location: Mid Wales
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1st Feb 07 at 01:31   View User's Profile U2U Member Reply With Quote
quote:
Originally posted by CorsAsh
Never has, and I've not farted in front of her. Cos I'm a gentleman
Tom
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Registered: 3rd Apr 02
Location: Wirral, Merseyside
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1st Feb 07 at 11:41   View User's Profile U2U Member Reply With Quote
MY ex used to make farting sounds when I was riding her like seabiscuit now and then, only when I got really deep and in funny positions though
Jamie Walby
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Registered: 15th Nov 04
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1st Feb 07 at 11:55   View User's Profile U2U Member Reply With Quote
quote:
Originally posted by Whittie
When you hold it in for too long they REALLY smell when they're out.


Thats because they have become more dense with poo particles......
Fee
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Registered: 16th Nov 05
Location: With AK
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1st Feb 07 at 12:01   View User's Profile U2U Member Reply With Quote
I remember the first time I farted infront of Adam...it was in my sleep and it woke us both up
I tried to pretend I was still asleep though because I was awful embarassed.

Then the next night I got shit faced and found it quite amusing..."oh my god...did you HEAR my fart last night"
Sam.S
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Registered: 8th Aug 02
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1st Feb 07 at 16:33   View User's Profile U2U Member Reply With Quote
Have you ever found that birds fart more if they are laughing?

Best ones are when your both asleep, and the mattress shudders and vibrates from the bird letting rip!

This thread is so interesting

Has anyone had the pleasure of their bird farting in the bath?
AndyW
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Registered: 28th Oct 02
Location: Greater London
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1st Feb 07 at 16:43   View User's Profile U2U Member Reply With Quote
is it just me or is every bloke like this?

when you or a mate farts its funny and we have competitions etc. its a lads things...

but if a girl farts i just look in disgust and think its manky.
CorsAsh
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Registered: 19th Apr 02
Location: Munich
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1st Feb 07 at 17:29   View User's Profile U2U Member Reply With Quote
quote:
Originally posted by AndyW
but if a girl farts i just look in disgust and think its manky.


It's because most lads dont like the thought of shagging something that smells like a compost heap.
A1EX
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Registered: 29th Mar 00
Location: Turku, Finland
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1st Feb 07 at 17:41   View User's Profile U2U Member Reply With Quote
quote:
Originally posted by SVM 286
quote:
Originally posted by All Torque
I don't know when she silently does it but i tickled her once which made her let rip and it sounded like a ship horn




*collapses on floor weeping and writhing*



<ambulance phoned for, and oxygen en route >


continuing same process!!!
its the mental images that are doing it for me
All Torque
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Registered: 17th Nov 05
Location: Milton Keynes Drives: Ford Focus TDCi
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1st Feb 07 at 17:44   View User's Profile U2U Member Reply With Quote
quote:
Originally posted by Sam.S
Have you ever found that birds fart more if they are laughing?



Yes, NEVER tickle them
All Torque
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Registered: 17th Nov 05
Location: Milton Keynes Drives: Ford Focus TDCi
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1st Feb 07 at 17:45   View User's Profile U2U Member Reply With Quote
BTW Best thread This year!
Sam.S
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Registered: 8th Aug 02
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2nd Feb 07 at 13:31   View User's Profile U2U Member Reply With Quote


Tickling is definately a no go area!
IntaCepta
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Registered: 25th Mar 02
Location: Mill Hill East, Greater London
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2nd Feb 07 at 16:01   View User's Profile U2U Member Reply With Quote
we play games
Sam.S
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Registered: 8th Aug 02
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2nd Feb 07 at 17:36   View User's Profile U2U Member Reply With Quote
how about fanny farts
j10E W
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Registered: 30th Sep 04
Location: maidstone
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2nd Feb 07 at 17:57   View User's Profile U2U Member Reply With Quote
i was gunna post that

disgusting
Sam.S
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Registered: 8th Aug 02
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2nd Feb 07 at 20:47   View User's Profile U2U Member Reply With Quote
Imagine... A fanny fart must be like farting through your japs eye?
mattk
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Registered: 27th Feb 06
Location: St. Helens
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3rd Feb 07 at 00:24   View User's Profile U2U Member Reply With Quote
LMFAO ^^^^
SVM 286
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Registered: 13th Feb 05
Location: pain
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3rd Feb 07 at 05:16   View User's Profile U2U Member Reply With Quote
quote:
Originally posted by AndyW
is it just me or is every bloke like this?

when you or a mate farts its funny and we have competitions etc. its a lads things...

but if a girl farts i just look in disgust and think its manky.


Terrence & Philip at Brooke Shields
SVM 286
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Registered: 13th Feb 05
Location: pain
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3rd Feb 07 at 05:17   View User's Profile U2U Member Reply With Quote
quote:
Originally posted by All Torque
quote:
Originally posted by Sam.S
Have you ever found that birds fart more if they are laughing?



Yes, NEVER tickle them
*reaches for O2 bottle again*
Scotty_B
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Registered: 11th Jun 03
Location: East Kilbride
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3rd Feb 07 at 10:25   View User's Profile U2U Member Reply With Quote
quote:
Originally posted by Sam.S
how about fanny farts


Odd watery things, and they are strong enough to strip wallpaper.

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