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Author cracker jokes
mattyross
Member

Registered: 22nd Dec 05
Location: lincolnshire Drives: 1997 C12NZ
User status: Offline
25th Dec 05 at 14:59   View User's Profile U2U Member Reply With Quote

just had my christmas lunch,, and the traditional craker that goes with it
not forgetting the usual shoot jokes that are within

mine was:
"what does an auctioneer need to know??"

"..lots"



shoot, soo shoot
who thinks of this crap?? lol
Marc D
Member

Registered: 29th Apr 03
Location: Wirral, Merseyside
User status: Offline
25th Dec 05 at 15:00   View User's Profile U2U Member Reply With Quote

whats the difference between a snowman and a snow woman?

snow balls
Corsalad87
Member

Registered: 17th Jan 04
Location: Trimdon Vill near Durham
User status: Offline
25th Dec 05 at 15:00   View User's Profile U2U Member Reply With Quote

i had that joke in mine!!! Got a metal magic trick included too!
Rob_Scarborough
Member

Registered: 19th Mar 01
Location: Scarborough
User status: Offline
25th Dec 05 at 15:01   View User's Profile U2U Member Reply With Quote

Whats brown and knocks on your window??? A poo on stilts.... Nothing to do with xmas at all, laughed like hell though
mattyross
Member

Registered: 22nd Dec 05
Location: lincolnshire Drives: 1997 C12NZ
User status: Offline
25th Dec 05 at 15:02   View User's Profile U2U Member Reply With Quote

quote:
Originally posted by corsaboy87
i had that joke in mine!!! Got a metal magic trick included too!


mine was a bizarre bent paperclip, that was required to be separated.. i actually quite enjoyed it lol
..oh and happy christmas CS
Corsalad87
Member

Registered: 17th Jan 04
Location: Trimdon Vill near Durham
User status: Offline
25th Dec 05 at 15:08   View User's Profile U2U Member Reply With Quote

i think we got the same crackers
mattyross
Member

Registered: 22nd Dec 05
Location: lincolnshire Drives: 1997 C12NZ
User status: Offline
25th Dec 05 at 15:10   View User's Profile U2U Member Reply With Quote

quote:
Originally posted by corsaboy87
i think we got the same crackers


sweeet baby jesuss
lol
ClaireF
Member

Registered: 1st Nov 05
Location: hurlford, scotland Drives: corsa again
User status: Offline
25th Dec 05 at 15:11   View User's Profile U2U Member Reply With Quote

quote:
Originally posted by mattyross
just had my christmas lunch,, and the traditional craker that goes with it
not forgetting the usual shoot jokes that are within

mine was:
"what does an auctioneer need to know??"

"..lots"



i got that one


shoot, soo shoot
who thinks of this crap?? lol
mattyross
Member

Registered: 22nd Dec 05
Location: lincolnshire Drives: 1997 C12NZ
User status: Offline
25th Dec 05 at 15:12   View User's Profile U2U Member Reply With Quote

this simply is the most popular cracker joke, no contest lol
quite scary when you think about it lol
Charlene
Member

Registered: 29th Sep 04
Location: Darlington
User status: Offline
25th Dec 05 at 15:13   View User's Profile U2U Member Reply With Quote

You must admitit you laugh, not because its funny but how pathetic they are
mattyross
Member

Registered: 22nd Dec 05
Location: lincolnshire Drives: 1997 C12NZ
User status: Offline
25th Dec 05 at 15:16   View User's Profile U2U Member Reply With Quote

quote:
Originally posted by Charlene
You must admitit you laugh, not because its funny but how pathetic they are


so bad its good innit
guess thats why we still have them
Scotty C
Member

Registered: 6th Nov 05
Location: Kidderminster Drives: 1.6 16v Sport
User status: Offline
25th Dec 05 at 15:52   View User's Profile U2U Member Reply With Quote

Mine was:

Why didnt the skelenton go to the party...

Because he had nobody to go with
Simon
Member

Registered: 24th Apr 03
Location: Oxfordshire
User status: Offline
25th Dec 05 at 15:56   View User's Profile U2U Member Reply With Quote

I had, what type of reptil is best at arithmatic?

An adder
Nath
Member

Registered: 3rd Apr 02
Location: MK
User status: Offline
25th Dec 05 at 16:20   View User's Profile U2U Member Reply With Quote

My crackers contained:

- a quote by a famous person
- trivia question
- charade
- and 'guess the eyes' with a small pic of a famous person

Fucking messed up.
AndyW
Member

Registered: 28th Oct 02
Location: Greater London
User status: Offline
25th Dec 05 at 16:28   View User's Profile U2U Member Reply With Quote

Q - what animals need oiling?

A - Mice, because they squeak...
Kathryn W
Member

Registered: 12th Oct 03
Location: Widnes, Cheshire
User status: Offline
25th Dec 05 at 17:19   View User's Profile U2U Member Reply With Quote

Q - What do you call a dog without a tail?

A - A Hotdog.


Q - Where do cows visit on a sunday?

A - The movies
Sly_SRi
Premium Member

Avatar

Registered: 9th Apr 04
Location: Reading, UK Drives: Corsa C
User status: Offline
25th Dec 05 at 18:12   View Garage View User's Profile U2U Member Reply With Quote

whats the difference between a man and a brussel sprout?

One of them is tasteless and smells awful, the other is a nutritious vegetable.


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