Dan. T
Member
Registered: 6th Jan 05
Location: Northampton Drives: Astra Coupe SE2
User status: Offline
|
The perks of being a man
1. Your ass is never a factor in a job interview.
2. Your orgasms are real. Always.
3. Your last name stays put.
4. The garage is all yours.
5. Wedding plans take care of themselves.
6. You never feel compelled to stop a friend from getting laid.
7. Car mechanics tell you the truth.
8. You don't give a rat's ass if someone notices your new haircut.
9. Hot wax never comes near your pubic area.
10. Same work, more pay.
11. Wrinkles-add character.
12. You don't have to leave the room to make emergency crotch adjustments.
13. Wedding Dress £2000; Tux rental £100.
14. If you retain water, it's in a canteen.
15. People never glance at your chest when you're talking to them.
16. New shoes don't cut, blister, or mangle your feet.
17. One mood, ALL the damn time.
18. Phone conversations are over in 30 seconds.
19. A five-day vacation requires only 1 suitcase
20. You can open all your own jars.
21. You get extra credit for the slightest act of thoughtfulness.
22. Your underwear is £10 for a three-pack.
23. If you are 34 and single, nobody notices.
24. You can quietly enjoy a car ride from the passenger's seat.
25. Three pairs of shoes are more than enough.
26. You can quietly watch a game with your mate for hours without ever thinking "He must be mad at me."
27. No maxi-pads.
28. If another guy shows up at the party in the same outfit, you just might become lifelong friends.
29. You are not expected to know the names of more than five colours.
30. You don't have to stop and think of which way to turn a nut on a bolt.
31. You are unable to see wrinkles in clothes.
32. The same hairstyle lasts for years, maybe decades.
33. Your belly usually hides your big hips.
34. One wallet and one pair of shoes, one colour, all seasons.
35. You can "do" your nails with a pocket-knife.
36. Christmas shopping can be accomplished for 25 relatives, on December 24th, in 15 minutes.
37. The world is your urinal.
|
Charlene
Member
Registered: 29th Sep 04
Location: Darlington
User status: Offline
|
|
Jake
Member
Registered: 24th Jan 05
User status: Offline
|
i work part time in a garage and sometimes have to stop and think which way i have to unbolt something
|
Rus
Member
Registered: 24th Jan 05
Location: SE London, Kent
User status: Offline
|
quote:
Originally posted by jake
i work part time in a garage and sometimes have to stop and think which way i have to unbolt something
you do like killing the mood
|
Balling
Premium Member
Registered: 7th Apr 04
Location: Denmark
User status: Offline
|
quote:
Originally posted by Dan. T
29. You are not expected to know the names of more than five colours.
|
Jake
Member
Registered: 24th Jan 05
User status: Offline
|
quote:
Originally posted by Rus
quote:
Originally posted by jake
i work part time in a garage and sometimes have to stop and think which way i have to unbolt something
you do like killing the mood
i have been known to.
|
Simon
Member
Registered: 24th Apr 03
Location: Oxfordshire
User status: Offline
|
made me smile during my evening of building analysis coursework 
|
Andrew
Member
Registered: 5th May 04
Location: Skoda Octavia Estate, Ford Puma
User status: Offline
|
|
