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Author New Drive Through Cash Machine
Baz-Zico
Member
Registered: 15th Jan 03
Location: Glasgow, Renfrewshire
User status: Offline
27th Oct 05 at 20:11   View User's Profile U2U Member Reply With Quote
-------------------------------PRESS RELEASE---------------------------------
Halifax Building Society is very pleased to announce that they are installing new "Drive Thru" Cash Dispensers.

To enable customers to gain maximum benefit from this new facility they have conducted intensive behavioural studies to come up with the appropriate procedures for their use.

AS FOLLOWS:

Procedures for MALE customers

1. Drive up to the cash machine
2. Wind down your car window
3. Insert your card into machine and enter PIN
4. Enter amount of cash required and withdraw
5. Retrieve card, cash, and receipt
6. Wind up window
7. Drive off

Procedures for FEMALE customers
1. Drive up to the cash machine
2. Reverse the required distance to align car window with cash machine
3. Re-start the stalled engine
4. Wind down the window
5. Find handbag, remove all contents onto passenger seat to find card
6. Turn the radio down
7. Attempt to insert card into machine
8. Open car door to allow easier access to cash machine due to its excessive distance from the car
9. Insert card
10. Re-insert card the right way up
11. Re-enter handbag to find diary with your PIN number written on the inside back page
12. Enter PIN
13. Press "cancel", and re-enter correct PIN
14. Enter amount of cash required
15. Check make-up in rear view mirror
16. Retrieve cash and receipt
17. Empty handbag again, to locate purse and place cash inside
18. Place receipt in back of chequebook
19. Re-check make-up
20. Drive forward 2 metres
21. Reverse back to cash machine
22. Retrieve card
23. Re-empty handbag, locate card holder, and place card into slot provided
24. Restart stalled engine and pull off
25. Drive for 2 to 3 miles
26. Release handbrake.
Nath
Member
Registered: 3rd Apr 02
Location: MK
User status: Offline
27th Oct 05 at 20:11   View User's Profile U2U Member Reply With Quote
Read/heard it before but still makes me laugh
Charlene
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Registered: 29th Sep 04
Location: Darlington
User status: Offline
27th Oct 05 at 20:14   View User's Profile U2U Member Reply With Quote
sexist
Karen
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Registered: 9th Jul 03
Location: Edinburgh
User status: Offline
27th Oct 05 at 20:19   View User's Profile U2U Member Reply With Quote
chris-sri
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Registered: 3rd Apr 05
User status: Offline
27th Oct 05 at 20:22   View User's Profile U2U Member Reply With Quote
Also what is it with people (not just women before anyone starts) who wait in the queue for a cash point then get to the front and spend 5 minutes fcuking about trying to find their card.
Andrew
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Registered: 5th May 04
Location: Skoda Octavia Estate, Ford Puma
User status: Offline
27th Oct 05 at 21:09   View User's Profile U2U Member Reply With Quote
Jake
Member
Registered: 24th Jan 05
User status: Offline
27th Oct 05 at 21:15   View User's Profile U2U Member Reply With Quote
25. Drive for 2 to 3 miles
26. Release handbrake.

hehehe
drax
Member
Registered: 5th Feb 05
Location: Sittingbourne, Kent
User status: Offline
27th Oct 05 at 21:19   View User's Profile U2U Member Reply With Quote
quote:
Originally posted by jake
25. Drive for 2 to 3 miles
26. Release handbrake.

hehehe


LOL! Loving it
Rus
Member
Registered: 24th Jan 05
Location: SE London, Kent
User status: Offline
27th Oct 05 at 21:21   View User's Profile U2U Member Reply With Quote
pmfsl
ed
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Registered: 10th Sep 03
User status: Offline
27th Oct 05 at 21:21   View User's Profile U2U Member Reply With Quote
Reeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee-post
Baz-Zico
Member
Registered: 15th Jan 03
Location: Glasgow, Renfrewshire
User status: Offline
27th Oct 05 at 21:24   View User's Profile U2U Member Reply With Quote
everythin's a re-post to you
IvIarkgraham
Premium Member

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Registered: 27th Mar 04
Location: Ellesmere Port, Cheshire
User status: Offline
27th Oct 05 at 21:30   View Garage View User's Profile U2U Member Reply With Quote
16. Retrieve cash and receipt
17. Empty handbag again, to locate purse and place cash inside
18. Place receipt in back of chequebook
19. Re-check make-up
20. Drive forward 2 metres
21. Reverse back to cash machine
22. Retrieve card

your cash doesnt come out till you remove the card so this joke is wrong
gianluigi
Member
Registered: 9th Mar 05
Location: Ipswich, Suffolk
User status: Offline
27th Oct 05 at 21:32   View User's Profile U2U Member Reply With Quote
Baz-Zico
Member
Registered: 15th Jan 03
Location: Glasgow, Renfrewshire
User status: Offline
27th Oct 05 at 21:34   View User's Profile U2U Member Reply With Quote
quote:
Originally posted by IvIarkgraham
16. Retrieve cash and receipt
17. Empty handbag again, to locate purse and place cash inside
18. Place receipt in back of chequebook
19. Re-check make-up
20. Drive forward 2 metres
21. Reverse back to cash machine
22. Retrieve card

your cash doesnt come out till you remove the card so this joke is wrong




meh

[Edited on 27-10-2005 by TheScotsman]
IvIarkgraham
Premium Member

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Registered: 27th Mar 04
Location: Ellesmere Port, Cheshire
User status: Offline
27th Oct 05 at 21:43   View Garage View User's Profile U2U Member Reply With Quote


i win
Jake
Member
Registered: 24th Jan 05
User status: Offline
27th Oct 05 at 21:45   View User's Profile U2U Member Reply With Quote
you win nothing because he didnt create the joke. I however, win.

 
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