leeshez
Member
Registered: 3rd May 01
Location: Great Harwood, Lancashire
User status: Offline
|
GCSE's
>
> The following questions and answers were collated from last year's
British
> GCSE exams.
>
> Geography
>
> Q: Name the four seasons.
>
> A: Salt, pepper, mustard and vinegar.
>
>
> Q: Explain one of the processes by which water can be made safe to
drink.
>
> A: Flirtation makes water safe to drink because it removes large
> pollutants like grit, sand, dead sheep and canoeists.
>
>
> Q: How is dew formed?
>
> A: The sun shines down on the leaves and makes them perspire.
>
>
> Q: What causes the tides in the oceans?
>
> A: The tides are a fight between the Earth and the Moon. All water
>
> tends to flow towards the moon, because there is no water on the moon
and
> nature abhors a vacuum. I forget where the sun joins in this fight.
>
>
> Sociology
>
>
> Q: What guarantees may a mortgage company insist on?
>
> A: If you are buying a house, they will insist you are well endowed.
>
>
> Q: What are steroids?
>
> A: Things for keeping carpets still on the stairs.
>
>
> Biology
>
> Q: What happens to your body as you age?
>
> A: When you get old, so do your bowels and you get intercontinental.
>
>
> Q: What happens to a boy when he reaches puberty?
>
> A: He says goodbye to his boyhood and looks forward to his adultery.
>
>
> Q: Name a major disease associated with cigarettes?
>
> A: Premature death.
>
>
> Q: How can you delay milk turning sour?
>
> A: Keep it in the cow. [He got an A]
>
>
> Q: How are the main parts of the body categorised? (e.g. abdomen.)
>
> A: The body is consisted into three parts - the brainium, the borax
and
> the abdominal cavity. The branium contains the brain, the borax
contains
> the heart and lungs, and the abdominal cavity contains the five
> bowels,A,E,I,O and U.
>
>
> Q: What is the Fibula?
>
> A: A small lie.
>
>
> Q: What does "varicose" mean?
>
> A: Nearby.
>
>
> Q: Give the meaning of the term "Caesarean Section."
>
> A: The caesarean section is a district in Rome.
>
>
> Q: What is a seizure?
>
> A Roman emperor.
>
>
> Q: What is a terminal illness?
>
> A: When you are sick at the airport.
>
>
> Q: Give an example of a fungus. What is a characteristic feature?
>
> A: Mushrooms. They always grow in damp places and so they look like
> umbrellas.
>
>
> English
>
> Q: Use the word "judicious" in a sentence to show you understand its
> meaning.
>
> A: Hands that judicious can be soft as your face.
>
>
> Q: What does the word "benign" mean?
>
> A: Benign is what you will be after you be eight.
>
|
