Jamie
Member
Registered: 1st Apr 02
Location: Aberdeen
User status: Offline
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SPEED KILLS- Drive a Ford and live longer.
A man pulled up next to a little girl walking home from school and said "If you get in, I'll give you a lollypop." The girl kept walking. Following along slowly, the man said "Come on and get in the car with me and I'll give you two lolly pops." She kept her eyes on the sidewalk and continued on her way. The man said "Get in with me and I'll give you this whole bag of lollypops!" Finally, the girl turned and said "Look daddy, YOU bought the Ford, YOU ride in it!!"
Driving a ford is like the special olympics....even if you win your still a retard (no offence)
Owners of Ford's often say: "That's not a leak, my Ford's just marking its territory!"
Did you know that Ford has a new magnetised bumper?
They needed something to pick up the parts that fell off along the way.
God make s**t, Ford gave it wheels
Did you know that 98% of all Fords ever built are still on the road?
The other 2% made it home!!
Keep out motorways clear, beautiful and user friendly.
So leave your Ford at home.
A guy walks into a service station and says to the attendant
"hey have you got a petrol cap for a ford"
and the attendant says "yeah sure sounds like a fair swap"
If Ford mean's(First on race day) It is only because it is still there from the last race day.
Q: How is a golf ball different from a Ford?
A: You can drive a golf ball 200 yards.
Q: Why are there footpaths beside roads?
A: So Ford owners have a safe place to walk home
Q: What kind of car did Fred Flinstone drive?
A: A ford of course, and it ain't much different now!
Q: How long can a ford go for with out repairs?
A: Depends if you can leave the ford dealer.
Q: What does a ford and a tampon have in common?
A: They both come with tow ropes.
If one or more of these is true, unfortunately, you are driving a Ford...
-You constantly receive sympathy cards from the Department of Transportation.
-When you are walking across the parking lot, you see a priest performing last rights on your car.
-While stopped at traffic lights, other motorists offer to help push to get you started again.
-You have preferred customer status at Partco.
-You have to stop along side the road at least once a day to pick up parts that have fallen off.
-You leave your keys in the ignition and a £20 note on the dash for petrol money in hopes that someone will steal your car.
-When you drive though town, people stop what they are doing and just start laughing.
-In place of a spare tire, you find a pair of running shoes
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groom
Member
Registered: 19th Apr 03
Location: In front of my pc
User status: Offline
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MarkM
Member
Registered: 11th Apr 01
Location: Liverpool
User status: Offline
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I had a ford for one year and it didnt cost me a penny in maintenance or break down once....
thankyouplease
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modded_corsa
Member
Registered: 9th May 03
Location: Middlesbrough
User status: Offline
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brother had a m-reg mondeo........had it for bout 6months
in all that time the only thing that went rong was
front left wishbone balljoint snapped
front right wishbone balljoint snapped
alternator packed in
starter motor packed in
a few sensors went doo-lally
the rubber door seals went (meaning water came in everytime it rained)
alternator belt snapped
battery died
he now drives a '04 MG-ZR 105
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MarkM
Member
Registered: 11th Apr 01
Location: Liverpool
User status: Offline
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Yes as u said...M reg....not the newest is it....mine was a new ford and held up well...
MGZR 105's are also shocking...mate has one...airbag has been in 4 times to be repaired as is faulty...brand new too...
oh and there slow
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Marc
Member
Registered: 11th Aug 02
Location: York
User status: Offline
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Very funny but untrue.
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liamC
Member
Registered: 28th Feb 04
User status: Offline
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You may slag Fords off, but their safety was second to none for me.
Front passenger;
Hit a lampost at 60mph
Car rolled 4 times
Car a complete and utter write off
Walked out with a scratch on my arm.
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modded_corsa
Member
Registered: 9th May 03
Location: Middlesbrough
User status: Offline
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quote:
Originally posted by sport16v
Yes as u said...M reg....not the newest is it....mine was a new ford and held up well...
MGZR 105's are also shocking...mate has one...airbag has been in 4 times to be repaired as is faulty...brand new too...
oh and there slow
quite untrue....for a 1.4 16v its got 105bhp.....which is a nice littlre mover.......only problem he has had with the mg zr is the clutch cable
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Wrighty
Member
Registered: 28th Feb 04
Location: Howden
User status: Offline
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nowt up with fords,specially not them RS Focus's!
why on earth people buy MG's is beyond me,theyre a rover with a spoiler n bright paint,my cous's girlfreinds is falling to bits and has been back to the garage 5 times now,do u have any Mg jokes?
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Russ
Member
Registered: 14th Mar 04
Location: Armchair
User status: Offline
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http://www.ford.co.uk/ie/fordgt/-/-
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MarkM
Member
Registered: 11th Apr 01
Location: Liverpool
User status: Offline
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quote:
Originally posted by modded_corsa
quote:
Originally posted by sport16v
Yes as u said...M reg....not the newest is it....mine was a new ford and held up well...
MGZR 105's are also shocking...mate has one...airbag has been in 4 times to be repaired as is faulty...brand new too...
oh and there slow
quite untrue....for a 1.4 16v its got 105bhp.....which is a nice littlre mover.......only problem he has had with the mg zr is the clutch cable
Did I say "For a 1.4 its slow!" no I didnt I merely stated its a slow car which it is..if you wanna be picky then it is dog slow compared to a 1.4 GT Punto...
thankyouplease
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Russ
Member
Registered: 14th Mar 04
Location: Armchair
User status: Offline
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shit gearboxes in zr's though, not amazing 1.4 at all
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