L33 LEG
Banned
Registered: 6th Jan 03
Location: Blackburn . Drove: Dimma Saxo VTR
User status: Offline
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ur momma
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Fluffy
Member
Registered: 28th Jun 05
User status: Offline
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quote: Originally posted by benny_h
At the end of the day ive gotta laugh at SetH and Vibrio here
restrain her? how the fcuk are you supposed to do that without hurting her? lock her in a room? shiste thats a good idea too, given the bloke that tried to kill her tied her up and locked her in a room for days just visiting her to give another slap 
i took the punches in her best interests, told her the police were being called and she carried on because she has issues
ive no regrets there. personally for both our lives i think i acted correctly
with regards to councelling...thats very very difficult. For six months afterwards she was diagnosed with post traumatic stress, and everybody (councillors included) thought it wasnt a good idea to talk through stuff that she would regress on. seemed to work at the time, matbe shes working through it
personally i'll never work it out, there again im not female and ive never been nearly killed by my boyf
Are you both okay now? Had a chance to talk and make up or is it too raw right now, must have been a shock for you both. Sounds like your gfriend was not helped by incorrect advice re counselling and has been holding fear inside her ever since from her past bad times which manifested itself onto you as rage... I hope you are okay and that you do stick by her and forgive her as this must be eating her up and as I know from bitter experience that this is the time when she will really be needing you and know you still care and love her
You can get through this, it isn't her fault or yours mate, hold the faith you had in loving her as much as I suspect she loves you however bad things seemed.
Good luck and hope you two end up stronger than ever in the end together
 
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Edd
Member
Registered: 8th Nov 04
Location: Glasgow
User status: Offline
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she has took advantage of your kind nature....................dump the bitch like a bag of dead puppies
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Sam
Moderator Premium Member
Registered: 24th Dec 99
Location: West Midlands
User status: Offline
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quote: Originally posted by Edd
she has took advantage of your kind nature....................dump the bitch like a bag of dead puppies
As it were.
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MatthewR
Member
Registered: 21st Oct 02
Location: Rickmansworth
User status: Offline
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dump that biatch and punch her face
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mwg
Member
Registered: 19th Feb 04
Location: South Lakes
User status: Offline
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suprise sex then dump
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Ally
Member
Registered: 2nd Jul 03
Location: Pontypool Drives: a Skoda
User status: Offline
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You can't post on a public forum without accepting some kind of stupid/sarcastic replies, people on here do post shit, if you cant take it, dont post on here.
Get her councilling, support her as best you can. If she really is messed up end the relationship but make sure she gets the help she needs. It can take years to recover from domestic voilence, and she may never recover, just learn to accept what happened and move on
Best thing to do if she lashes out is to go into another room and sit in front of the door, i had an ex who was a bit of a shit and that worked for me. He would spend 15 minutes kicking the door and trying to get in, use all his energy up then collpase in a fit of tears and apologise.
Needless to say i didnt stay with him for very long after all that kicked off 
I think it depends on the kind of person you are, if you are prepaired to take on the emotional work in helping her then stay, she will love you more in the end
If not, leave now because it gets so bad you feel that u cant
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Ally
Member
Registered: 2nd Jul 03
Location: Pontypool Drives: a Skoda
User status: Offline
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and good luck, never fight back to harm her but make her aware you aren't going to take any shit from her, you love her, and will support her but arent there to be used as a punch bag when she has a turn
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schoey
Member
Registered: 29th Jun 05
Location: Billinghay, Lincolnshire
User status: Offline
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the thing is, hardly any of us know you and your not even a prem member, so we dont know if your just having a laugh.
We've all got problems, but most of us choose not to air them to people we dont know.
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Fluffy
Member
Registered: 28th Jun 05
User status: Offline
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I think it depends on the kind of person you are, if you are prepaired to take on the emotional work in helping her then stay, she will love you more in the end

I agree, now could be the making of you both, she will get help, you will get the woman you love and she will know you are no fair weathered lover 
Think of yourself here too mate. It is easy to just feel sorry for yourself and move on. But will you ever know just what a wonderful life you could have with this girl if you just get through this hurdle?
Dont lose each other now, you have supported her and I suspect you have received much love and joy from her.
Time heals everything... And you two will be inseperable and bonded stronger than ever before if you make up and still love each other now.
Happy Christmas
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Fluffy
Member
Registered: 28th Jun 05
User status: Offline
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People who write such things are sick, inconsiderate and dont take the time to read the thread and see the whole story.
Once again, she has nearly been killed, has had you but no counselling, without counselling, extreme stress can make people do things out of character.
You know her better than anyone and know the true worth of the girl you love, give her a break here, sorry sounds like your beef is more with the police than her mate
Good luck to the pair of you, love conquers all, believe me
^^^ typed by a person who has never had a loved one assaulted
fuck off , if i had a loved one assalted id go do something about it with the person who did it .
not complain on a public car forum about it like a little bitch then start ranting about it .
personally i dont give a fuck if shes been assalted , i dont know her .
you have to laugh really. it wouldnt be funny if it was your sister or mum wouldnt it?
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vibrio
Banned
Registered: 28th Feb 01
Location: POAH
User status: Offline
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quote: Originally posted by benny_h
At the end of the day ive gotta laugh at SetH and Vibrio here
restrain her? how the fcuk are you supposed to do that without hurting her? lock her in a room? shiste thats a good idea too, given the bloke that tried to kill her tied her up and locked her in a room for days just visiting her to give another slap 
i took the punches in her best interests, told her the police were being called and she carried on because she has issues
ive no regrets there. personally for both our lives i think i acted correctly
with regards to councelling...thats very very difficult. For six months afterwards she was diagnosed with post traumatic stress, and everybody (councillors included) thought it wasnt a good idea to talk through stuff that she would regress on. seemed to work at the time, matbe shes working through it
personally i'll never work it out, there again im not female and ive never been nearly killed by my boyf
it is quite easy to restrian someone with out hurting them.
your still a pussy
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vibrio
Banned
Registered: 28th Feb 01
Location: POAH
User status: Offline
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quote: Originally posted by Edd
she has took advantage of your kind nature....................dump the bitch like a bag of dead puppies
take advantage of the situation the next time hold her down and fuck her ass. tell her it was the only was to calm her down
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Fluffy
Member
Registered: 28th Jun 05
User status: Offline
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you have to laugh really. it wouldnt be funny if it was your sister or mum wouldnt it?
My thoughts exactly 
My ex got over serioud dv in a relatively short time, she is now making somebody else a very happy man I lost her as I made a bad decision to walk away, dont walk mate, stay, really, it could be the worst decision of your life (sorry dont know how old you are) so far if you turn your back now.
Wish you both lots of luck, poor girl sounds like she needs a decent man like you at last 
Cheers and once more
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vibrio
Banned
Registered: 28th Feb 01
Location: POAH
User status: Offline
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quote: Originally posted by schoey
the thing is, hardly any of us know you and your not even a prem member, so we dont know if your just having a laugh.
We've all got problems, but most of us choose not to air them to people we dont know.
yes you have pink hoses in your engine bay.
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Nath
Member
Registered: 3rd Apr 02
Location: MK
User status: Offline
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quote: Originally posted by vibrio
quote: Originally posted by benny_h
At the end of the day ive gotta laugh at SetH and Vibrio here
restrain her? how the fcuk are you supposed to do that without hurting her? lock her in a room? shiste thats a good idea too, given the bloke that tried to kill her tied her up and locked her in a room for days just visiting her to give another slap 
i took the punches in her best interests, told her the police were being called and she carried on because she has issues
ive no regrets there. personally for both our lives i think i acted correctly
with regards to councelling...thats very very difficult. For six months afterwards she was diagnosed with post traumatic stress, and everybody (councillors included) thought it wasnt a good idea to talk through stuff that she would regress on. seemed to work at the time, matbe shes working through it
personally i'll never work it out, there again im not female and ive never been nearly killed by my boyf
it is quite easy to restrian someone with out hurting them.
your still a pussy
I.e. Positive Handling, as taught to alot of teachers and TA's in schools for kids with behavioural problems. Restraint without causing harm.
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Jules S
Premium Member
Registered: 24th Dec 03
User status: Offline
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Well, given some of the posts here i wasnt going to reply....but since some of you seem to care and post here i will
believe me im no attention seeking troll, im a right old timer though....and i'd been on the pop when i started this thread. I only joined here cos Ed (i believe) tried racing me in his silver corsa 
Anyways, the dust has settled somewhat. unfortunately she has had an 'emotional' breakdown (as opposed to 'nervous' - dont understand that)
She has sought trauma councelling, and from what I can gather she cant remember much of the incident. Seems the best guess is that she blanked out and flashbacked to the original assualts when she feared for her life 
Anyway, Im still in touch with her, but im taking time out to re-charge my batteries whilst she gets further help
FWIW, i didnt start this thread for it to be a sob story...if you read it it was more of a poke at the police wanting to interview me...ie its always the bloke thats at fault where domestic violence is concerned
 
btw I never realised not being 'premium' made any difference to your worthiness to post here!!! maybe i should pay up and (not) shut up LOL

edit: shit, essay again, sorry, i can touch type 
[Edited on 22-12-2005 by benny_h]
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Fluffy
Member
Registered: 28th Jun 05
User status: Offline
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quote: Originally posted by benny_h
At the end of the day ive gotta laugh at SetH and Vibrio here
restrain her? how the fcuk are you supposed to do that without hurting her? lock her in a room? shiste thats a good idea too, given the bloke that tried to kill her tied her up and locked her in a room for days just visiting her to give another slap 
i took the punches in her best interests, told her the police were being called and she carried on because she has issues
ive no regrets there. personally for both our lives i think i acted correctly
with regards to councelling...thats very very difficult. For six months afterwards she was diagnosed with post traumatic stress, and everybody (councillors included) thought it wasnt a good idea to talk through stuff that she would regress on. seemed to work at the time, matbe shes working through it
personally i'll never work it out, there again im not female and ive never been nearly killed by my boyf
To be fair mate, after all the poor girl has suffered, it's amazing she could find the strength of character to try relationships ever again! 
Must be real love on both sides if ya ask me  
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Fluffy
Member
Registered: 28th Jun 05
User status: Offline
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quote: Originally posted by benny_h
Well, given some of the posts here i wasnt going to reply....but since some of you seem to care and post here i will
believe me im no attention seeking troll, im a right old timer though....and i'd been on the pop when i started this thread. I only joined here cos Ed (i believe) tried racing me in his silver corsa 
Anyways, the dust has settled somewhat. unfortunately she has had an 'emotional' breakdown (as opposed to 'nervous' - dont understand that)
She has sought trauma councelling, and from what I can gather she cant remember much of the incident. Seems the best guess is that she blanked out and flashbacked to the original assualts when she feared for her life 
Anyway, Im still in touch with her, but im taking time out to re-charge my batteries whilst she gets further help
FWIW, i didnt start this thread for it to be a sob story...if you read it it was more of a poke at the police wanting to interview me...ie its always the bloke thats at fault where domestic violence is concerned
 
btw I never realised not being 'premium' made any difference to your worthiness to post here!!! maybe i should pay up and (not) shut up LOL

edit: shit, essay again, sorry, i can touch type 
[Edited on 22-12-2005 by benny_h]
So glad to hear you are still in touch with her and that she is now in trauma counselling. I wouldn't be at all surprised if she cannot remember anything about it as it probably was all too much for her to cope with and during her epsiode with you would imagine anything that happened was like another person and not her at all. Had this with my ex. Emotional breakdown is the same as nervous I guess.
You need a little time too and be there for her as you are the stronger one right now, when she is better and that could be in no time at all with these courses she can then prove to be a tower of strength for you.
Dont lose the girl you love now mate, look at me, never regretted anything more in my life
  
Hope you will be calling for us to by hats in the near future
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L33 LEG
Banned
Registered: 6th Jan 03
Location: Blackburn . Drove: Dimma Saxo VTR
User status: Offline
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STOP FUCKIN QUOTING THE PARAGRAPHS
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Fluffy
Member
Registered: 28th Jun 05
User status: Offline
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quote: Originally posted by L33 LEG
STOP FUCKIN QUOTING THE PARAGRAPHS
You too mate
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vibrio
Banned
Registered: 28th Feb 01
Location: POAH
User status: Offline
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quote: Originally posted by L33 LEG
STOP FUCKIN QUOTING THE PARAGRAPHS
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L33 LEG
Banned
Registered: 6th Jan 03
Location: Blackburn . Drove: Dimma Saxo VTR
User status: Offline
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ian should ban the lot of u, firstly cos ur quoting too much and secondly cos one of u sounds like a complete pussy
running away from his bird and getting her arrested
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Fluffy
Member
Registered: 28th Jun 05
User status: Offline
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Give her a great Christmas mate 
You two need to enjoy a happy one this Sunday 
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vibrio
Banned
Registered: 28th Feb 01
Location: POAH
User status: Offline
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quote: Originally posted by L33 LEG
ian should ban the lot of u, firstly cos ur quoting too much and secondly cos one of u sounds like a complete pussy
running away from his bird and getting her arrested
yes I took this picture tonight and it reminded me of this thread
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