Shelly
Premium Member
Registered: 15th Nov 00
Location: Lancashire Drives: Astra H VXR
User status: Offline
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Need a message to go in a card, from a woman to a bloke
Something funny
Ideas please?!
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C2RL R
Member
Registered: 28th Mar 02
Location: Redcliffe, QLD
User status: Offline
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roses are red violets are blue, i'm a bit of a slag and i wanna fuck you.
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Robbo
Member
Registered: 6th Aug 02
Location: London
User status: Offline
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Google Shelly, might be some good uns on there
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Jay
Member
Registered: 26th Sep 04
Location: Liverpool
User status: Offline
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quote:
Originally posted by C2RL R
roses are red violets are blue, i'm a bit of a slag and i wanna fuck you.
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Shelly
Premium Member
Registered: 15th Nov 00
Location: Lancashire Drives: Astra H VXR
User status: Offline
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thanks Robbo!
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Joe
Member
Registered: 20th Jun 04
Location: Hesketh Bank, Lancashire
User status: Offline
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quote:
Originally posted by Robbo
Google Shelly, might be some good uns on there
Not very funny though Robbo 
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Robbo
Member
Registered: 6th Aug 02
Location: London
User status: Offline
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C2RL R
Member
Registered: 28th Mar 02
Location: Redcliffe, QLD
User status: Offline
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on a different topic, why the hell does that rhyme say violets are blue? they are not blue they are fucking violet.
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Lawrah
Premium Member
Registered: 25th Dec 04
User status: Offline
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Roses are red, this poems real corny
It’s supposed to tell you, you make me feel horny
That it’s you I’ve longed for from afar
And that I want to make love to you over the car
How forever to you, I’ll always be true
And that I’ll never leave you for that fit bloke on floor Two
How with you I always want to spend my day
Tied to the kitchen sink, whilst our 23 kids outside do play
About how I love your smile and your eyes
And how when you kiss me I get butterflies
How I like it when you do this or that
And that I even like you when you act like a prat
But my darling I can’t tell such lies
‘Cause for you I only feel loathe and despise
And the idea of spending time with you is torture
I’d really rather be hung drawn and quarter(ed)
I’ve written this little ode so you’ll no longer be misled
About who I dream of having tucked up in my bed
So make yourself comfortable, and listen as I define
Why you’ve no hope in hell of being my Valentine!
This might sound shallow and full of self care
But I can’t walk down the street with you, just look at your hair
You’ve really bad breath and you stink of B.O.
You’re the male equivalent of a dirty skanky ho
You can’t dance for toffee, ‘cause your stiff as cardboard
And I’m not into the Max Bygraves records you hoard
I don’t like to go train spotting or to collect stamps
And I’ve no interest in the maggot you keep in your pants
You’re dress sense is more Oxfam, than Gucci or Armani
And its doesn’t impress me that you know the words to Pupunanny
I’m not thrilled by the fact that your head only comes up to my chest
And no I can’t just use it as a place for my boobs to rest
You aint got sexy footballers legs like Mr Rooney
And your teeth are more Austin Powers than George Clooney
Your knees are knobbly and your hands are too small
You get drunk after one shandy and you can’t kick a ball
You’ve no sense of direction, and your co-ordinations naff
And who are you kidding with your fake dirty laugh?
Add to that the fact your jokes are crap
And you really are drippier than an old broken tap
I hope my constructive criticism hasn’t caused you offence
But that you’ve got the point now, because I know you’re so dense
And all your begging and pleading won’t sway my mind
Unless you win the lottery jackpot or a million pounds you do find
Now “Sweetheart” there’s only one thing left for me to say
Hope you have a really “FANTASTIC” Valentines Day!
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Ally
Member
Registered: 2nd Jul 03
Location: Pontypool Drives: a Skoda
User status: Offline
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She said message, not an essay law
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Ally
Member
Registered: 2nd Jul 03
Location: Pontypool Drives: a Skoda
User status: Offline
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Youre a very special person
And you mean a lot to me
When youre around you make the world A better place to be
 *pukes*
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Lawrah
Premium Member
Registered: 25th Dec 04
User status: Offline
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Roses are straight,
Violets are twisted,
Bend over love,
You're about to get f*sted.
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Lawrah
Premium Member
Registered: 25th Dec 04
User status: Offline
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Roses are crap,
Violets are shit,
Sit on my face,
And wiggle a bit.
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C2RL R
Member
Registered: 28th Mar 02
Location: Redcliffe, QLD
User status: Offline
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Ally
Member
Registered: 2nd Jul 03
Location: Pontypool Drives: a Skoda
User status: Offline
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Give me a smooch
then a little kiss
Ill lick your gooch
For a mouthful of piss
im making up poems with the girl i work with
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Shelly
Premium Member
Registered: 15th Nov 00
Location: Lancashire Drives: Astra H VXR
User status: Offline
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Lawrah & Ally 
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Tommy L
Member
Registered: 21st Aug 06
Location: Northampton Drives: Audi wagon
User status: Offline
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quote:
Originally posted by Lawrah
Roses are straight,
Violets are twisted,
Bend over love,
You're about to get f*sted.
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Aaron
Member
Registered: 9th Aug 04
Location: Cottingham, East Riding
User status: Offline
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alleh....you're pure filth (in a good way)
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Ally
Member
Registered: 2nd Jul 03
Location: Pontypool Drives: a Skoda
User status: Offline
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Yes
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Steve
Premium Member
Registered: 30th Mar 02
Location: Worcestershire Drives: Defender
User status: Offline
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this thread is gay as fuck, even gayer now im here
[Edited on 11-02-2008 by Steve]
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VTR2008
Member
Registered: 6th Feb 08
User status: Offline
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gay gay gay
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Steve
Premium Member
Registered: 30th Mar 02
Location: Worcestershire Drives: Defender
User status: Offline
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indeed
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Edd
Member
Registered: 8th Nov 04
Location: Glasgow
User status: Offline
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quote:
Originally posted by Shelly
Need a message to go in a card, from a woman to a bloke
Something funny
Ideas please?!
Edd,
i want your babies
shelleh xxx
that should do
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Shelly
Premium Member
Registered: 15th Nov 00
Location: Lancashire Drives: Astra H VXR
User status: Offline
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it isn't for me....
I have already sorted mine 
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C2RL R
Member
Registered: 28th Mar 02
Location: Redcliffe, QLD
User status: Offline
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quote:
Originally posted by Shelly
it isn't for me....
I have already sorted mine
i shall be checking the post for it shelleh.
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