kz
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Registered: 9th Aug 02
Location: Southend, Essex Drives: Mini Cooper S
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thats me 
however, i did manage to (drunkingly) pull an amazing girl the other week, and got her number. shes a mate of a mate of a mate anyway so i had been introduced before. now i never usually follow things up, pretty much look at the title of the thread for the reason. but this girl is something special and i do actually wanna get to know her.
we been sending a few texts, chatting online a little bit, but nothing major. hopefully shes out this weekend, but she said shes quite broke so might not be.
i think come next week ive gotta make a decision a) leave it... b) go for it... now the reason of this post. if i go for it... what do i do!? few drinks in the pub? do i drink or drive? walk down the front? somewhere else? what do you even talk about im well shy and can never think of anything to say 
hopefully shell reject me then i have nothing to worry about 
in reply to any tips that work, if i ever get any naughty pics ill post em up 
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Cosmo
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Registered: 29th Mar 01
Location: Im the real one!
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take her out for a meal, then go for a drink/walk along the front on the way to drinks, etc. Just somewhere nice so you can talk.
And as for what to speak about....whatever! Just let it flow. If you get on then no matter how shy you are then it will be easy to keep the chatter up!
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LeeM
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Registered: 26th Sep 05
Location: Liverpool
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go for it you mong! you only live once. i always think i'll have nothin to talk about... next thing its last orders and weve been talking for 6 hours!
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Colin
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Registered: 4th Apr 02
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nothing ventured nothing gained - go for it
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Colin
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Registered: 4th Apr 02
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If your shy & not very good at making conversation out of nothing take her somewhere where theres lots of stuff to talk about, a meal or drinks in a pub, cinema etc might be a bit awkward!!
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kz
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Registered: 9th Aug 02
Location: Southend, Essex Drives: Mini Cooper S
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true. although i could make a complete dick of myself? haha. not about a meal though damn... unless we get something to eat in the pub!? drinks are good, dutch courage
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Cosmo
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Registered: 29th Mar 01
Location: Im the real one!
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thats life, you have to take the risk sometime or you'll just be a loney fucker until you die!
If your going to go for something to eat then do it properly. If not then just drinks or something.
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Colin
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Registered: 4th Apr 02
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She might feel bad if you take her out for meal & drinks knowing shes skint & you'll have to pay............depending what sort of girl she is, might be the opposite
Walk down the front - whats 'down the front' ??? Is there stuff to do & talk about???
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Cosmo
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Registered: 29th Mar 01
Location: Im the real one!
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quote:
Originally posted by Colin
She might feel bad if you take her out for meal & drinks knowing shes skint & you'll have to pay............depending what sort of girl she is, might be the opposite
Im all for splitting the cost of stuff once your going out. But Id always be offering to pay if I was taking a girl out on a first date!
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Colin
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Registered: 4th Apr 02
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quote:
Originally posted by Cosmo
quote:
Originally posted by Colin
She might feel bad if you take her out for meal & drinks knowing shes skint & you'll have to pay............depending what sort of girl she is, might be the opposite
Im all for splitting the cost of stuff once your going out. But Id always be offering to pay if I was taking a girl out on a first date!
Yeah me to, id offer to at least if I had an incline they wouldnt mind though some might decline on principle.
Lets look at the facts:
1st date
Dont know here much but would like to
She's skint
Meal - bit upfront for a get to know her date
Drinks - good but 1st date you might get over nervous, get pissed & make a wally of yourself - blow it.
Nice walk 'down the front' - plenty to do hopefully, just casually getting to know her without being too full on.
I personally usually take a 1st date round mine & stick a dvd on, glass of wine & some quality chit chat...........from there you can do meal & drinks etc.......!
Cinema is a huge no!!!!!
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kz
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Registered: 9th Aug 02
Location: Southend, Essex Drives: Mini Cooper S
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quote:
Originally posted by Colin
She might feel bad if you take her out for meal & drinks knowing shes skint & you'll have to pay............depending what sort of girl she is, might be the opposite
Walk down the front - whats 'down the front' ??? Is there stuff to do & talk about???
yeah im not sure about that paying thing? i dont mind offering or doing it, but some girls get kinda offended?
as the for the front, well, theres quite a few things down the front. but really, it would be better in the day then theres things like mini golf, get an ice cream and stuff. but at night probably not a lot to do with a girl other than nice views  wow
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JadeM
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Registered: 9th Feb 06
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quote:
Originally posted by Colin
Yeah me to, id offer to at least if I had an incline they wouldnt mind though some might decline on principle.
Lets look at the facts:
1st date
Dont know here much but would like to
She's skint
Meal - bit upfront for a get to know her date
Drinks - good but 1st date you might get over nervous, get pissed & make a wally of yourself - blow it.
Nice walk 'down the front' - plenty to do hopefully, just casually getting to know her without being too full on.
I personally usually take a 1st date round mine & stick a dvd on, glass of wine & some quality chit chat...........from there you can do meal & drinks etc.......!
Cinema is a huge no!!!!!
*cough* ermmmm how many 1st dates you had round yours then? 
[Edited on 05-06-2007 by JadeM]
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Cosmo
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Registered: 29th Mar 01
Location: Im the real one!
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quote:
Originally posted by Colin
I personally usually take a 1st date round mine & stick a dvd on, glass of wine & some quality chit chat...........from there you can do meal & drinks etc.......!
Cinema is a huge no!!!!!
Depends how well you know her though, as some girls probably wouldnt be too comfortable with being invited round yours for a first date...might get the wrong idea
Agreed with the cinema though, big no no!
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Cosmo
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Registered: 29th Mar 01
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quote:
Originally posted by JadeM
*cough* ermmmm how many 1st dates you had round yours then?
it was our second date when he got me round his, so thats fine
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Colin
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Registered: 4th Apr 02
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quote:
Originally posted by JadeM
*cough* ermmmm how many 1st dates you had round yours then?
Not many 
I used to throw mum & pops out for the night before I got my own place on the odd occasion if I was planning to entertain a lady
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Colin
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Registered: 4th Apr 02
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quote:
Originally posted by Cosmo
quote:
Originally posted by Colin
I personally usually take a 1st date round mine & stick a dvd on, glass of wine & some quality chit chat...........from there you can do meal & drinks etc.......!
Cinema is a huge no!!!!!
Depends how well you know her though, as some girls probably wouldnt be too comfortable with being invited round yours for a first date...might get the wrong idea
Jade didnt, we watched human traffic then had a snog on the couch
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kz
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Registered: 9th Aug 02
Location: Southend, Essex Drives: Mini Cooper S
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house on first "date"? nah. plus i never have a free house so its basically yeah hi, come to my room straight away lol. maybe id be better off trying to arrange something for the day time but then that seems a little childish really
i really dont understand how to have an "adult" relationship lmao... all ive done the past couple of years is shag people then fade away into the background so i dont have to talk to them anymore
yes, time i grew up!
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Cosmo
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Registered: 29th Mar 01
Location: Im the real one!
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quote:
Originally posted by Colin
Jade didnt, we watched human traffic then had a snog on the couch
come to think about it, my first date with the missus was at hers (parents were away) watching some shitty film. Although we had been talking for ages at college so wasnt some 'first date' kind of thing!
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Cosmo
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Registered: 29th Mar 01
Location: Im the real one!
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just go for something to eat FFS, bring her back to yours and get pics. Simple as.
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AK
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Registered: 5th Jul 00
Location: Aberdeen City
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she's human, she is the same as you.
Just talk about what interets you/her etc.... if she's interested in you she'll be open enough
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Jules
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Registered: 26th Nov 04
Location: Ipswich, Suffolk Status: Happy
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I'm as shy as you infront of women, but when you meet someone who you feel comfortable with you'll be fine, you won't need to have any plan or anything prepared - as cosmo said - it'll just flow.
Happened to me a few weeks back, went out for a drink with a girl to a quiet pub, we just chatted about anything and everything, went really, really well and if she wasn't already in a relationship I wouldn't be single now I doubt!
But I took a lot of confidence from that and I'm going out with someone else later this week, same kind of thing, i'm picking her up so she can have a couple of drinks if she likes (I'm not a heavy drinker anyway - nor is she but she may be just as nervous as I will be), we're going to a quiet rural pub where we can sit down and chat, rather than shout, to each other.
No idea what we'll talk about but no doubt we'll think of something.
Go for it - you have NOTHING to lose but everything to gain, and even if she doesn't think about you in the way you think about her then you can stay friends - it's a win/win situation.
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Jules S
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Registered: 24th Dec 03
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Ah well here we go then....been wondering the same thing for nigh on 25 years now....and none the wiser but here is my 10p worth...
If she's up for a date (sounds like) ask her up front what she wants to do...i reckon 1 in 10 will say 'i would like to do etc' if so job sorted 
second bet wouldn't be a meal tbh (thats third date material imo) I would suggest a couple of drinks in mutual surroundings with mates and a meal after if its cool how things are going (ie if she is`relaxed and enjoying your company)
Golden rule is to get chatting and let the convo flow....the absolute WORST thing you can do is take somebody to a place where they feel left out and abandoned...even when they are sat at the same table as you in a pub.
HTH
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kz
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Registered: 9th Aug 02
Location: Southend, Essex Drives: Mini Cooper S
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cool cheers jules. i lack confidence, so i would be hoping it would go well, or next time id wait about three years before doing it again
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Colin
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Registered: 4th Apr 02
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CS relationship counseling
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Colin
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Registered: 4th Apr 02
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quote:
Originally posted by Jules S
If she's up for a date (sounds like) ask her up front what she wants to do...i reckon 1 in 10 will say 'i would like to do etc' if so job sorted
See id say that 9 times out of 10 they say, ive not got a clue..........you decideMust just be the girls around these parts
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