Craig W
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Registered: 31st Oct 00
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Right, my mum and dad have recently split up and are in the process of going through a very messy break up. Until yesterday, only me, my sister, mum and dad knew about the circumstances. I'm not going into details, but my dad f*cked up big time.
Last night my mum went round her brothers (my uncle) to tell her and my brother everything.
My uncle and my brother are both coming round tonight to 'discuss' things with my dad and basically tell him he's got to leave and get out of the house until it's sold.
Now, before my mum told them, she was quite happy for my dad to stay in the spare room while it all goes through, as he's not there much anyway because he works away at weekends. He still pays all the bills.
Basically they've put all sorts of ideas into her head and the whole situation has blew up.
My uncle told my mum he'd only come round tonight if i wasn't there, so it's quite obvious what they have in mind. He knows that if he goes for my dad i'll put him on his arse. Ive already made it clear im not leaving my dad alone with them. Yeah, he f*cked up, but i'd never wish him any harm.
My uncle and brother asked my mum to get some beers in and she went and brought Stella - great lol.
My brother is very hot headed, and thinks he's a bit of a gangster. My uncle is a proper mans man, so i know he'll have it in for my dad.
Im sure it'll end in violence, but im going to sit them all down from the start and basically tell them that whats happened has happened, theres no point in getting petty, and for the whole families sake it's best if we try and sort this out as cleanly as possible.
I have to deal with violence every day of the week for my profession, but it's different when its your own family and im not sure how long i'll be able to keep up the act of the referee all night.
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B3KYR
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Registered: 5th Jan 05
Location: Wakefield
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 how confusing is that ha ha
good luck anyway 
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vibrio
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Registered: 28th Feb 01
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you can't force your dad to leave. he has a legal right to stay in the house. in all honesty your ucle has no real right to get involved. unless your dad has been violent towards your mum I don't see it as a problem.
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Tom
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Registered: 3rd Apr 02
Location: Wirral, Merseyside
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sounds a nasty position, but yopu seem to have it scoped out well. Just try and keep a civil tone and keep reminding them of the effects it'll have on everyone if it blows up. I take it you're the biggest lad in the family if your uncles scared of you 
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JadeM
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Registered: 9th Feb 06
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You sound the most sensible one out of them all 
True what you say, whats happened has happened nothing can change that now.
Sitting down and talking it through is the sensible way to deal with it
XxX
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Craig W
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Registered: 31st Oct 00
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quote:
Originally posted by vibrio
you can't force your dad to leave. he has a legal right to stay in the house. in all honesty your ucle has no real right to get involved. unless your dad has been violent towards your mum I don't see it as a problem.
Exactly, my dad doesn't even want my uncle to get involved because to be honest, it's none of his business. My mums welfare is his business, yes, but my dad would never physically harm her.
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_Allan_
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Registered: 24th Mar 04
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Later that evening Craig retuned home from work....
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gianluigi
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Registered: 9th Mar 05
Location: Ipswich, Suffolk
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mate i know what messy break ups are like. i only wish i had a similar build to you, then perhaps when things got more messy than necessary i would have had some back bone to stand up and put people in their place. i just stay out of it all now. nothing to do with me.
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vibrio
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Registered: 28th Feb 01
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U2U OJC for backup
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Craig W
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Registered: 31st Oct 00
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quote:
Originally posted by Tom
sounds a nasty position, but yopu seem to have it scoped out well. Just try and keep a civil tone and keep reminding them of the effects it'll have on everyone if it blows up. I take it you're the biggest lad in the family if your uncles scared of you
Im the biggest yeah, they're both builders and are fairly big, typical mens men i suppose. In all honesty i think my dads quite worried, he's quite big himself but ive assured him i'll get in the way of any flying fists to begin with lol.
My brother is the kind of person who will pay someone to do something so he doesn't get his hands dirty. But if my uncles rares up it'll get him going too.
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Pablo
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Registered: 3rd Feb 03
Location: Milton Keynes
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the craiginator
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vibrio
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Location: POAH
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PM video feed 
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Craig W
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Registered: 31st Oct 00
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When they first broke up my brother made things worse. He didn't know any circumstances but shielded my mum from everyone and wouldn't let us talk to her one particular night. My sister went round there and they argued, she smacked him in the face and he went to hit her with a spade but didn't. I hink it was just a natural reaction to being hit. He wouldnt hurt her.
I found out, went steaming round there ready for a mini war, burst trhough his door and they was all sitting around the table chatting
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JadeM
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Registered: 9th Feb 06
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Cant you talk to your mum & tell her inviting them round will just put fuel in the fire & will surely end up coming to blows & that wont solve anything!! Then calmly remind your uncle that as much as you like him your dads still your dad & if he so lays a hand on him you will put him on his arse quicker than he knows whats happened!! 
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Edd
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Registered: 8th Nov 04
Location: Glasgow
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tbh your uncle should not really be involved but then he is only looking out for family,
tell them that if they wish to talk you will be in attendance and no drink will be consumed, its just asking to blow up if they are drinking
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Pablo
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Registered: 3rd Feb 03
Location: Milton Keynes
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Leave it to mum and dad to srot, rest stay out
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Martyn
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Registered: 17th Oct 03
Location: Luton
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Tom
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Registered: 3rd Apr 02
Location: Wirral, Merseyside
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quote:
Originally posted by Edd
tbh your uncle should not really be involved but then he is only looking out for family,
tell them that if they wish to talk you will be in attendance and no drink will be consumed, its just asking to blow up if they are drinking
Sensible words but if it does go off you sounds like u got it covered anyway
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Craig W
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Registered: 31st Oct 00
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quote:
Originally posted by Pablo
Leave it to mum and dad to srot, rest stay out
In an ideal world mate. This world is far from ideal.
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Melville
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Registered: 4th Jun 03
Location: Newcastle upon Tyne
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I take it this is the follow on from "have you ever hit a family member" 
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Liam
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Registered: 19th Jan 06
Location: Stafford
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quote:
Originally posted by JadeM
You sound the most sensible one out of them all
True what you say, whats happened has happened nothing can change that now.
Sitting down and talking it through is the sensible way to deal with it
XxX
I think ur right, he seems more responsible than your Uncle, who should set a
good example to you not jus go round to harm your Dad, cus what happens, happens, so good luck with it all
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JadeM
Premium Member
Registered: 9th Feb 06
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Get on Trisha.....she will sort it all out
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bradfincham
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Registered: 20th Sep 02
Location: East Of England Drives: Clio 172
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yeh its between mum and dad no one else!
yes the uncles are upset your dad has hurt there sister etc but thats life these days!
as long as he hasnt been battering her about then im sure they can talk it through like adults!
Its the best way for all parties to remain on talking terms.
My folks split, and my dad still contacts my mums family, he was there at my mums mums funeral etc.
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Liam
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Registered: 19th Jan 06
Location: Stafford
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or Jeremy Kyle show
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Pablo
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Registered: 3rd Feb 03
Location: Milton Keynes
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quote:
Originally posted by Craig W
quote:
Originally posted by Pablo
Leave it to mum and dad to srot, rest stay out
In an ideal world mate. This world is far from ideal.
Tell me bout it, my dads gone through 2 divorses and 1 was with my mother
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