LiL_AnGeL
Member
Registered: 1st Apr 07
Location: here there and everywhere
User status: Offline
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I recall my first time with a condom, I was 16 or
so. I went in to buy a packet of condoms at the
pharmacy. There was this beautiful woman assistant
behind the counter, and she could see that I was new at it.
She handed me the package and asked if I knew how to wear one.
I honestly answered, 'No, this is my first time.'
So she unwrapped the package, took one out and slipped it over her thumb.
She cautioned me to make sure it was on tight and secure.
I apparently still looked confused. So she looked all around the store
to see if it was empty. It was empty.
'Just a minute,' she said, and walked to the door, and locked it.
Taking my hand, she led me into the back room,
unbuttoned her blouse and removed it. She unhooked
her bra and laid it aside. 'Do these excite you?' She
asked. Well, I was so dumb-struck that all I could do
was nod my head. She then said it was time to
slip the condom on.
As I was slipping it on, she dropped her skirt,
removed her panties and lay down on a desk. 'Well,
come on', she said, 'We don't have much time.'
So I climbed on her. It was so wonderful, that
unfortunately, I could no longer hold back and
KAPOW, I was done within a few minutes.
She looked at me with a bit of a frown. 'Did you
put that condom on?' she asked.
I said, 'I sure did,' and held up my thumb to show her.
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Scotty C
Member
Registered: 6th Nov 05
Location: Kidderminster Drives: 1.6 16v Sport
User status: Offline
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fail
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nova_gteuk
Member
Registered: 15th May 02
Location: South Wales Drives: The Bandwagon
User status: Offline
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1992 want their joke back.
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Hammer
Member
Registered: 11th Feb 04
User status: Offline
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I sniggered 
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Dione J
Member
Registered: 22nd Sep 04
Location: West Midlands Drives: Leon Cupra Turbo
User status: Offline
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RyanSxi
Member
Registered: 26th Jul 06
User status: Offline
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Tommy L
Member
Registered: 21st Aug 06
Location: Northampton Drives: Audi wagon
User status: Offline
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Theham85
Member
Registered: 29th Nov 06
Location: Brisbane Queensland
User status: Offline
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A grin appeared on my face
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Fonz
Premium Member
Registered: 12th May 06
Location: Newbury, Berks
User status: Offline
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Colin
Member
Registered: 4th Apr 02
User status: Offline
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This is the story of Rindercella and her sugly isters.
Rindercella and her sugly isters lived in a marge lansion. Rindercella
worked very hard frubbing sloors, emptying poss pits, and shivelling shot.
At the end of the day, she was knucking fackered.
The sugly isters were right bugly astards. One was called Mary Hinge, and
the other was called Betty Swallocks; they were really forrible huckers;
they had fetty sweet and fetty swannies. The sugly isters had tickets to go
to the ball, but the cotton runts would not let Rindercella go.
Suddenly there was a bucking fang, and her gairy fodmother appeared. Her
name was Shairy Hithole and she was a light rucking fesbian. She turned a
pumpkin and six mite wice into a hucking cuge farriage with six dandy
ronkeys who had buge hollocks and dig bicks
The gairy fodmother told Rindercella to be back by dimnlight otherwise,
there would be a cucking falamity.
At the ball, Rindercella was dancing with the prandsome hince when suddenly
the clock struck twelve. "Mist all chucking frighty!!!" said Rindercella,
and she ran out tripping barse over ollocks, so dropping her slass glipper.
The very next day the prandsome hince knocked on Rindercella's door and the
sugly isters let him in. Suddenly, Betty Swallocks lifted her leg and let
off a fig bart. "Who's fust jarted??" asked the prandsome hince. "Blame
that fugly ucker over there!!" said Mary Hinge. When the stinking brown
cloud had lifted, he tried the slass glipper on both the sugly isters
without success and their feet stucking funk.
Betty Swallocks was ducking fisgusted and gave the prandsome hince a knack
in the kickers. This was not difficult as he had bucking fuge halls and a
hig bard on.
He tried the slass glipper on Rindercella and it fitted pucking ferfectly.
Rindercella and the prandsome hince were married. The pransome hince lived
his life in lucking fuxury, and Rindercella lived hers with a follen
swanny
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Marshall
Member
Registered: 10th Nov 05
Location: Boston, Lincs Drives: 1.4 Sport & 2.2 astra
User status: Offline
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whats
with
all
the
big
spaces..
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Aaron
Member
Registered: 9th Aug 04
Location: Cottingham, East Riding
User status: Offline
|
quote:
Originally posted by Marshall
whats
with
all
the
big
spaces..
E mail formatting at a guess
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Huwsi
Member
Registered: 27th Apr 07
Location: Bangor, Gwynedd
User status: Offline
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at colin's post
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Timbaland
Banned
Registered: 20th Jan 07
Location: Glasgow
User status: Offline
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quote:
Originally posted by Colin
This is the story of Rindercella and her sugly isters.
Rindercella and her sugly isters lived in a marge lansion. Rindercella
worked very hard frubbing sloors, emptying poss pits, and shivelling shot.
At the end of the day, she was knucking fackered.
The sugly isters were right bugly astards. One was called Mary Hinge, and
the other was called Betty Swallocks; they were really forrible huckers;
they had fetty sweet and fetty swannies. The sugly isters had tickets to go
to the ball, but the cotton runts would not let Rindercella go.
Suddenly there was a bucking fang, and her gairy fodmother appeared. Her
name was Shairy Hithole and she was a light rucking fesbian. She turned a
pumpkin and six mite wice into a hucking cuge farriage with six dandy
ronkeys who had buge hollocks and dig bicks
The gairy fodmother told Rindercella to be back by dimnlight otherwise,
there would be a cucking falamity.
At the ball, Rindercella was dancing with the prandsome hince when suddenly
the clock struck twelve. "Mist all chucking frighty!!!" said Rindercella,
and she ran out tripping barse over ollocks, so dropping her slass glipper.
The very next day the prandsome hince knocked on Rindercella's door and the
sugly isters let him in. Suddenly, Betty Swallocks lifted her leg and let
off a fig bart. "Who's fust jarted??" asked the prandsome hince. "Blame
that fugly ucker over there!!" said Mary Hinge. When the stinking brown
cloud had lifted, he tried the slass glipper on both the sugly isters
without success and their feet stucking funk.
Betty Swallocks was ducking fisgusted and gave the prandsome hince a knack
in the kickers. This was not difficult as he had bucking fuge halls and a
hig bard on.
He tried the slass glipper on Rindercella and it fitted pucking ferfectly.
Rindercella and the prandsome hince were married. The pransome hince lived
his life in lucking fuxury, and Rindercella lived hers with a follen
swanny
That gave me a sore head...
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Adam_B
Member
Registered: 13th Dec 00
Location: Lancashire
User status: Offline
|
quote:
Originally posted by nova_gteuk
1992 want their joke back.
i laughed when i got to here
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RS6
Member
Registered: 5th Nov 03
Location: with MJ
User status: Offline
|
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bigdan
Member
Registered: 4th Jan 07
Location: Jarrow (Newcastle)
User status: Offline
|
quote:
Originally posted by Theham85
A grin appeared on my face
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Mark Prydderch
Member
Registered: 7th Mar 07
Location: Chester
User status: Offline
|
quote:
Originally posted by Adam_B
quote:
Originally posted by nova_gteuk
1992 want their joke back.
i laughed when i got to here
haha, me too.
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Kathryn W
Member
Registered: 12th Oct 03
Location: Widnes, Cheshire
User status: Offline
|
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sand-eel
Member
Registered: 15th Mar 07
Location: carluke/braidwood--IRNBRULAND
User status: Offline
|
quote:
Originally posted by bigdan
quote:
Originally posted by Theham85
A grin appeared on my face
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Richie B
Member
Registered: 18th Apr 04
Location: Newcastle
User status: Offline
|
quote:
Originally posted by Colin
This is the story of Rindercella and her sugly isters.
Rindercella and her sugly isters lived in a marge lansion. Rindercella
worked very hard frubbing sloors, emptying poss pits, and shivelling shot.
At the end of the day, she was knucking fackered.
The sugly isters were right bugly astards. One was called Mary Hinge, and
the other was called Betty Swallocks; they were really forrible huckers;
they had fetty sweet and fetty swannies. The sugly isters had tickets to go
to the ball, but the cotton runts would not let Rindercella go.
Suddenly there was a bucking fang, and her gairy fodmother appeared. Her
name was Shairy Hithole and she was a light rucking fesbian. She turned a
pumpkin and six mite wice into a hucking cuge farriage with six dandy
ronkeys who had buge hollocks and dig bicks
The gairy fodmother told Rindercella to be back by dimnlight otherwise,
there would be a cucking falamity.
At the ball, Rindercella was dancing with the prandsome hince when suddenly
the clock struck twelve. "Mist all chucking frighty!!!" said Rindercella,
and she ran out tripping barse over ollocks, so dropping her slass glipper.
The very next day the prandsome hince knocked on Rindercella's door and the
sugly isters let him in. Suddenly, Betty Swallocks lifted her leg and let
off a fig bart. "Who's fust jarted??" asked the prandsome hince. "Blame
that fugly ucker over there!!" said Mary Hinge. When the stinking brown
cloud had lifted, he tried the slass glipper on both the sugly isters
without success and their feet stucking funk.
Betty Swallocks was ducking fisgusted and gave the prandsome hince a knack
in the kickers. This was not difficult as he had bucking fuge halls and a
hig bard on.
He tried the slass glipper on Rindercella and it fitted pucking ferfectly.
Rindercella and the prandsome hince were married. The pransome hince lived
his life in lucking fuxury, and Rindercella lived hers with a follen
swanny
Two Ronnies FTW 
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